A Chocolate Shake, Dear

Prompt:

"Imagine a crowded fast food restaurant. Pick several imaginary characters with very different personalities. Put words in their mouths as they order food or talk to their friends.

Then have your readers decide what kind of personalities the characters have, based on what you've written."

The band of customers inched forward as one-by-one they all placed their orders. The McDonald's was stuffy and there was barely room for people to mill about.

"What can I get for you?" The sweaty teenager in a yellow cap shouted. An auburn-haired woman with three friends sashayed up to the counter.

"Three fruit and yogurt parfaits," she turned to the shortest of the four women and stared at her coaxingly. Hesitantly, the second woman said,

"And a double cheeseburger. Please." The other three melted into titters while the short woman blushed furiously. A man with a graying beard and holey overalls scolded angrily,

"When you ladies have finished giggling, I think there's customers here who would actually like to eat." The women paid the cashier and hastened out of the way.

When the impatient man had voiced his string of lunch requests, it was the turn of a man in his early thirties, who carried a curly-haired three year old on his hip. The father appeared flustered but smiled down at his daughter as he spoke.

"A girl's chicken nuggets happy meal with a lemonade and a grilled chicken wrap with a diet coke." An elderly lady, who knitted while she waited, played peek-a-boo with the girl. When the dad pulled out his wallet, he paid in mostly coins and ones but he let the child help him count the money out.

The lady moved slowly to the counter, limping noticeably.

"A chocolate shake, dear" She requested smoothly.

Introduction

When I flicked on the light, I groaned at the mess that was illuminated. It appeared that every item I had ever owned had come back to haunt me by hurling itself on the fuzzy carpet floor, which was no longer visible. I just knew it was under there somewhere. Clothes - green, blue, jeans, soft cotton, furry sweaters - were strewn haphazardly. Brightly colored school books and lined notebook papers rested wrinkled and hidden. Smooth sequined pillows and a penguin patterned quilt posed mockingly next to the twin bed in the corner. An open chip bag billowed sour cream and onionyness towards me. Stepping lightly so I wouldn't break anything, I crossed the scene. I pressed play and turned the cheering sounds up loud enough to cover my mother's berating from the next room. The melody and vocals integrated to form music that produced a smile even as I undertook this daunting task.

I spun in a circle, not sure where to start exactly. Usually, I began by making piles of things I was keeping and those I was giving away. But this time there wasn't one clean surface to begin a pile on... I was a relatively clean person and this disastrous personality of my room always shocked me. It was as if elves destroyed the place when I was not in it. Just when that thought arose, there was a shimmer in the air in front of me that was nearly three feet tall and one foot wide. A dwarf with a black beard and a rumpled face materialized. I stumbled back and tripped over who knows what. "Are you the one who's been doing this?" I questioned him angrily. I was amazed too though. He nodded.

The prompt for this snippet is as follows:

"Think about something you know well. What are the little details of the situation you chose? What do you notice with your five senses? Make up a character and put that character into a similar setting. Add convincing details as you write about it."

In this blog, I will be writing the exercises from the book Seize the Story by Victoria Hanley. It's a writing handbook for teens. Each time I blog I will be post the prompt and my finished (well as finished as anything a writer writes can ever be...) product and it's your job to tell me what you think! I want to know the good, the bad, and the ugly. But don't be mean ugly about it. So have you got this? I'll break it down.

1. Read my writing and the prompt.

2. See if I followed the prompt's directions.

3. Review the scene I wrote in a general sense.

Thank you!! I appreciate all commentary because everything helps. My goal is to become a published writer and you're going to assist me in getting there!

Sincerely,

Me